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    Hi,  On May 3, 2003 I attended a two week counseling course conducted by Dr. Basil Frasure.  I learned some things while I was there that have changed my life.  He taught me how to discover who I really was in God's eyes.  I've searched for this my whole life and at times I got a clear picture but it only lasted for a day or two.  Self doubt, fear, anxiety, drugs, selfishness, lust, confusion and lack of trust in God and His word prevented me from clearly seeing myself as God saw me all along.

    I was raised in a little country town in Arkansas.  I have four brothers and three sisters (I'm the third youngest).  My father was a violent alcoholic and put extreme fear in me at a young age.  What made things worse was the way he made fun of me.  I was shy and awkward and he amplified those feeling by mocking me.  I started drinking at age 13 and smoking pot at 16 yrs. of age.  This helped me to numb my inferior feelings (I wasn't concerned about long term effects).  By the time I was 21, drugs and alcohol were a big part of my life.  It sounds bad now but at the time I just wanted to escape into my dream world to avoid the fear and anxiety inside of me.

    As I got older I started developing noticeable personality disorders. I went to a psychiatrist and was prescribed medications (xanax / klonopin / different antidepressants).  The medications were very similar to the drugs and alcohol that I abused but they were less fun.  However, they did manage to numb my emotions and that was better than having to face my problems.  They didn't solve my problems though, and I continued to see psychiatrists and psychologists.  I was diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder, obsessive compulsive personality disorder and borderline personality disorder.

    My physical symptoms were: restless leg syndrome, bruxism, TMJ, depression, ringing ears, constipation, panic, and severe anxiety.  I couldn't sleep at night either and that just aggravated the symptoms even more.  On July 20, 2000 at the age of 36, I decided to surrender everything to God.  I was going to live just like a perfect Christian.  This was a great decision but I expected things to get better immediately.  After a few days of success in not doing street drugs, I became overwhelmed with fear, anxiety, self doubt and doubting God.  I did drugs off and on for the next couple of years and was sinking into a deeper depression.  My thinking actually got delusional and I wasn't even aware of it.  I wanted to die and that occupied my thoughts, along with drugs to numb the pain.  I became sicker each day.  I resented God and every happy successful person it this world!  I enjoyed bad news because it made me feel more alive.

    I never attempted suicide (I was to afraid that hell was real and I didn't want to burn in hell for eternity), so I made the decision to get help. I learned that I couldn't do it on my own.  I started trusting God and listening to Him instead of begging and whining, then saying " See, if you were real, you would help me"  I joined a church and vowed to never stop going and to develop christian friendships.  I studied the Bible and developed some patience for the first time in my life.

    Patience and trusting God that I could be restored led me to Basil Frasure's website.  I knew that I had to see him.  He taught God's word and I had to speed up my progress with God so I scheduled a two week stay in San Angelo.  I believed in my heart that Basil could help me in spite of my circumstances. (I still did drugs sometimes and had a lot of self doubt).  He did, he taught me who I was in God's eyes.  I am a changed person.  Basil was able to drive home some of God's teachings and change my thinking.  I learned that I didn't have to get anyone's approval anymore.  God loved me like I was.  Well, I can't hardly believe it but I am free.  I explode with joy and when satan knocks on my door now, I say "Jesus, will you get that for me?"

    One last little tidbit of what God did for me when I trusted Him.  I smoked a pack of cigarettes a day for twenty years.  I knew that smoking was bad for me and I tried to quit four times without success. (the cravings were just too strong)  While I was being counseled in San Angelo, I made a commitment to God that I would quit again and live with the withdrawal symptoms.  He took away the withdrawal symptoms!  The only time they come back is when I forget to trust Him.

    Basil is a gifted counselor who is as good of an example as I've ever seen at displaying God's grace.  He is able to bring light to God's word in several different ways. He does this through analogies, videos, scripture memorizing etc.  His greatest example to me is how graceful he is.  If you are very serious about changing your life and are committed to doing things God's way only, Basil can help you.

    If you would like, you can contact me with questions or comments through my e-mail address:
 

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    I pray that all of your needs are met as you learn to trust God with EVERYTHING.

A YEAR LATER:  (June 2004)

    I continue to feel the peace of God in my life and  I continue to have less and less fear.   My emotions are so stable now compared to a year ago.  Visiting you was such a blessing for me.  Below is a list of blessings that I've received since visiting you a year ago.

1.  I quit smoking.
2.  I stopped using drugs.
3.  I've been off medications for nine months now.
4.  My sleep is fully restored.
5.  My heart has peace and joy now instead of fear.
6.  I'm teaching a weightlifting class at the boys and girls club.
7.  I'm a full time student in college with all A's (so far).
8.  I'm working at UALR in the Health Science Dept.
9.  I am happily married.
10. My outlook on life has changed from pessimistic to optimistic.
11. Marilyn (my wife) and I are very close to buying a house.
12. I obey God out of love and respect instead of guilt and obligation.
13. My self-doubt is changing to confidence in God.
14. I have hope for my future.
15. I feel like a leader instead of a loser.